Tuesday, January 20, 2009
JING THIS BLOG IS NOT DEAD!
here's the post...
been freakin busy the past few days.. average of let's see.. 2 hours of sleep every night? plus falling asleep infront of the lappy.. investiture 2009 really has like LOADS OF THINGS TO DO.. omg DECO DECO!!!!!!
sigh. there's stupid prep PREP chem paper tomorrow.. everyone except one failed and i haven't started studying AT ALL now.. omg.. GG!!
so many things cramping up.. feeling real useless and incompetent.. why doesn't anything that i ever do go right? there's always flaws here and there.. did i not look at the bigger picture and think? or is it just my god damn ass fate that's this unlucky that something always goes wrong.. commitments and schoolwork never seem to balance out well.. there's just so many things to be done and even if it was done, nothing ever is right.. even if it's done nothing is ever satisfactory or it will just be seen as totally crap work.. i dun have the capabilities to live up to the expectations.. neither are my feelings well sorted out and ready to go..
nothing seems to be right.. nothing even seems to GO right.
why can't anything i do ever stop swerving to the side track and actually go straight? is it so difficult for things to actually go right. so difficult for ME to actually finally do something bloody right for once?
the final conclusion?
i'm just useless.
i flew away@ 11:09:00 PM
Thursday, January 15, 2009
kay.. my blog is really un-updated..
school's a slave driving instituition.. omg ALL SIAs.. or most.. ARE DUE AFTER CHINESE NEW YEAR??????!!!!!
talk about a HAPPY NEW YEAR MAN!
other day at assembly.. the teachers were still talking about how we were suppose to kope with sec 4 workload... and even they realise that the stupid workload is heavy and their poor girls dun have at least 8 hours of sleep per day and they still flood us with so many assignments and stuffs.. woah HOW THOUGHTFUL..
and ms yap wants 80% distinction in higher chinese and 100% pass in the o'levels..
WOAH.. the last time we got a 70% was like 4 years ago or something? thanks man ms yap.. ur WONDERFUL..
but i shall anyway aim for a freakin distinction so that i can dun take chinese in HCJC(:
went through a list of goals in 2009 with jingwen... first few are lame and i shall not talk about it... othe goals include getting a 75% for overall and distinction in o's..
BEATING MUGGER X IN FREAKIN BIOLOGY!!! OMG PIAH FOR BIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
let me check..
...
BE A GOOD PRESIDENT and GWH FOR SYF'09!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DISTINCTION FOR RUAN
oh..
and a 70% MUGGER!!!!!!!!!!!
jing totally didn't belief in the last one can.. sigh.. i shall work hard and BUCK UP!!!!!! been freakin busy the past few days.. auditions and CO.. many things to do and catch up with.. school timetables are like freakin weird.. who on earth gets like dismissed at times of 2:35pm??? and then there's like 1:45 as well..
WOAH that's early..
but adding remedials afterwards.. it's a different story...
sigh shall resume back to my work.. maybe someday u ppl will see me walking around the classroom with a chem textbook on my head T.T
i flew away@ 10:06:00 PM
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Like i said.. 2009 definitely started with a BIG BANG...
woke up rather early in the morning to go to school... earlier than usual la to be exact.. woke up at like 6? stupid jing was in school already when i was still eating breakfast?? omg talk about kiasu-ness:p
bus ride was freakin long.. cursing the stupid sec ones under my breath.. let's just hope there weren't any of them around me or anything=x
and now i realise i'm typing at a very slow rate O_O
first day was ok.. our classroom is like in the MOST ULU CORNER OF THE SCHOOL!! k la. apart from the one upstairs.. it's like the most corner in the science block and somemore on the second floor O_O thank goodness i didn't get that lost when i was trying to find it..
ms lee is our form teacher now and mac mac as our assistant form teacher.. so much for the ratation.. kinda weird but we're happy(: and there's this alex jones tagging along wit mac mac where ever he goes.. is ny like going through some caucasian craze or something?
class elections went well.. KANG YANG and JING are our MUMMIES(: haha manage to be postless this year again(: yay!
other than that nothing much for first day... PSL was ok.. 106 seemed quite quiet for a matter of fact.. they didn't talk much but after playing wacko which they LOVED TO SABO ME FOR.. we manage to bond a little better.. let's hope monday will be better(:
has lecture from james tan for like one freakin hour on rounding up of 2008 and other random stuffs that totally didn't make any sense or anything.. so much for missing us.. audi sitting arrangement changed and now we're like SMACK IN FRONT OF THE SPEAKER! bad view and bad place for talking and stuffs.. omg
now here comes the BIG BANG..
came home at bout 7 plus thanks to cca.. OH YA! TONG UR BOOKS ARE WIT ME NOW!(:
thanks again to whoever who brought it back(: u noe who u are but THANKS! and i will make u pay for loosing my jacket!!!!!
anyway... came home and had my shower.. mum gave me this noodles that she dunno packed from where.. small portion but nevertheless kinda filling..
bout 5 mins or so started having running nose for no freakin reason and my eyes started to swell.. went to the toilet and realise IT WAS SWOLLEN.. so i checked wit mum if there were any seafood in the noodles and she said no.....
then added...
i tink there is crab meat..
WOAH
started to feel uncomfortable and rashes and swelling started to appear... so mummy gave me this small pill that supposedly will ease all the symptoms of allergy and stuffs.. but didn't reall work well as more rashes and swelling appeared and i couldn't breath O_O
so was rushed to the nearby clinic and sent to this room at the corner to wait for the doc.. totally couldn't open my eyes at all.. now i understand how it feels to be blind.. goodness.. doc came in shortly.. could hear that he was a male but cannot see him at all since i couldn't open my eyes.. gave me a jab and 6 pills and oxygen mask since i couldn't breath...
omg 6 PILLS!? O_O the jab was ok.. oxygen mask smelled sweet at first.. suppose to open up my windpipe since it was swollen and stuffs but in the end my rashes were still on and my breathing got even worse..
maybe i'm allergic to air?=x
so doc came in and decides that i have to go to the hospital... GREAT. called the ambulance and waited.. rashes got worse and my breathing got worse but at least i could speak a little so the mask did work somehow.. called rachel to tell her that m4 can be used for rehearsal.. guess i might have shocked her since i was like panting and talking at the same time=x
paramedics came.. couldn't see anything still as my eyes totally cannot open by now.. kept telling me to stay calm and i was safe coz they were here and stuffs..
well i WAS calm for a matter of fact.. mentally but not physically since i was breathing too fast for normal and my entire body was numb and rigid..
serious.. hands were like clammed shut and totally cannot feel anything...
oh and the ambulance was freakin white.. or i guess it was coz my eyes were closed so everything seemed white la..
on the way to the hospital the paramedic kept telling me to breath slower and breath with him.. the oxygen mask was really in the way coz i was breathing through the mouth and the air was kinda hot O_O he was like telling me to breath with him.. one breath of his and i took 4-5 breaths already.. the other one laughed and said..
u have no talent in making her breath with u(:
LOL? then they continued to tell me to relax and stay calm and BREATH SLOWER.. kept patting me and telling me to BREATH SLOWER.. i tink they said it like 10 times?
well i was TRYING to breath slower but it was freakin difficult..
got admitted into NUH emergency unit.. the doc there gave me a flush or something coz blood pressure was too low and again told me to breath slower.. decided to give me the adrenaline jab thingy to curb the allergy.. so there goes another 2 jabs.. the adrenaline hurt like shit but the drip one was still ok.. maybe it was coz i was half conscious or something so didn't reall take notice of anything.. and besides.. i was numb..
after the jab and drip which took another half an hour or so.. my rashes subsided but the stupid swelling didn't.. doc decides to admit me into ICU for observation coz they were afraid after 6 hours of the adrenaline effect.. m symptoms will arise again and besides.. my blood pressure was low O_O
so there goes me into ICU.. realised it was the childrens one since i was still 15 and there were like loads of winnie the pooh stickers on the windows and doors O_O 3 docs came in to check on me.. one did a thorough chek through from head to toe.. still numb at that moment and i was a little faint already.. so verdict was more drips O_O and observation......
so the entire night i had a total of 4 packets of drips, 3 glucose thing and 1 dunno wat.. 6 jabs, including 3 steroids.. 6 pills from the clinic doc and another 2 times at ICU..
all within one night.. round 6 hours?
WOAH
no wonder mum say i have an overdose of medication.. but then again.. since my blood pressure never reached 100 the entire night and hovered around 90-ish.. no wonder they kept dripping me...
at least now i'm back home and happy(: manage to convince the doc that i WAN'T TO GO HOME and not stay in ICU anymore.. though my legs and hands were still freakin numb and a bit rigid.. but i guess it's fine since i'm still alive(:
hospital food was ok.. realise they gave me milk for both lunch and breakfast.. think that's the kids one la.. so haha.. drank the milo for breakfast only and gave the macaroni to mum.. lunch didn't eat.. drank the soup since i had another drip in the morning O_O heart rate was freakin irregular and it hovered around 60-80.. didn't reach 90 much.. but i was freakin hyper.. as mentioned by jing.. something must be wrong wit the machine la=x
got this epipen now for emergency uses.. those kind u see on tv and stuffs.. freakin big injection that'll last 10-15 mins if another episode of this comes again.. doc said it'll be painful and told me to be mentally prepared O_O
have to TOTALLY AVOID SEAFOOD from now on.. full check up due in 4 weeks time to see for more allergy..
didn't noe a few shreds of crab meat will turn out this bad.. goodness..
i flew away@ 10:26:00 PM